Oh, Nigel Farage!
Is it true you've a racist garage?
Filled with pictures of Enoch
A Jim Davidson wall-clock
Some Mel Gibson posters
And an Aryan toaster
That helps keep you pretty well fed
And won't let you put in brown bread

Oh, Nigel Farage!
You're no fan of, how you say, “gay marriage”
You say such equality
Is wanton frivolity
The poofters and dykes
Can all get on their bikes
Why should they be treated the same?
It's their choice, so they are to blame!

You make Clarkson look like a seasoned debater
Or Julie Burchill like an amateur hater
You look like the offspring
Of an unholy tryst betwixt fish
And potater

Oh, Nigel Farage!
Your support is just a mirage
It's been demonstrated
The uneducated
From ill-informed quarters
Are your core supporters
And your candidates seem so to be
Mostly rejects from the BNP

Oh, Nigel Farage!
You're not all that keen on fromage
You don't need foreign wine
You can get by just fine
On a nice pint of beer
If it was brewed here
Close the borders and all will be well
The import/export trade can go to hell!

You don't want DNA here from non-English sources
Though the toffs all look like they've been rogering horses
We need genes from elsewhere
Or we'll breed backward bigots
With overbites and bad hair

Oh, Nigel Farage!
How we wish you were hit with a barrage
Of falafels and bhajis
While Belgians and Argies
Hurl your manifesto
Smeared in dijon and pesto
And all manner of things from abroad
While we all stand around and applaud

Oh, Nigel Farage!
Foreign folk you gladly disparage
One last thing we feel we should mensh
You xenophobic tit, your name's French!

Written by Intermittent Explosive Disorder
© Copyright 2014